_ So, it's been several days since I've written anything. I've drawn a few pictures, but I haven't really put together the necessary steps to post them here. I might eventually, but I won't make a guarantee. Only used-car salesmen and politicians are allowed to do that, and it never seems to work out well for most people.

You: "So, what's been going on lately in your life, Matt?"

Me: "Well, not a whole lot."

You: "That's it? Oh c'mon. I clicked the link to come read this post, and that's the most you can offer? I'm your Mindsay friend, dammit. Where are those hilarious stories? Where are the keen observations on life? Where are the sometimes cryptic entries you make in place of something you really should be telling us about?"

Me: "Well, since you put it that way . . . "

_ I'd say the biggest change in my recent life has been my hair. It's longer these days. It exhibits a little more curl than it used to. It makes my Red Sox cap look better. It's making the transition into Spring quite nicely, and despite all I've just said about it . . . I don't really give a damn about my hair. I'm mentioning my red curls because it's one thing I can focus on in order to avoid the larger issues of greater importance. My hair, my clothes, my job, SportsCenter, the transmission in my truck, my iPod; these are all the same in the way that they all occupy me in aversion to spending time with the matters that require my immediate and active attention. The matters I should really be focusing on are as follows: school, and love.

_ I should focus on school, because I honestly believe that it's the quickest way to (future) financial stability, a sense of personal accomplishment, and a further broadening of horizons. I still can't help but feel like I'm wasting my time and money in college, but I've realized that's it's not just a feeling anymore. I really am wasting my time and money in college. But where normal people would stop going to classes and eventually drop out, like I did last Spring, I decided I'm just going to try turning things around. Things are only wasted because the full potential isn't being met. My time and money devoted toward college is being wasted because I'm not striving for the grades I know I can make. More basically, I'm wasting my life away in this place, because I'm not actually choosing to do anything with it. I think my life in the past two years has been all about waiting for things to happen, and that's been a mistake I intend to correct. I see school as a readily available method of "mistake-mending", but it's all about finding the motivation to actually start.

_ I should focus on love, if for no other reason than what a person wiser than I once said, "All you need is love." But aside from that, I love someone more than I ever knew, but in the face of actually telling her . . . I've been too scared. I've chosen to believe I should be more concerned with matters of academia instead of taking a chance to do what I know to be the best thing I could ever do for myself. I've chosen to think I have far too many matters more important than she is, while she probably tires of watching me daily waste my chance with her. If I have a brain in my head, and a heart in my chest, then I'll realize the best thing in my life (a girl) deserves to feel the love that she's been giving to me for so many years. Because in the end, if everything works out like it should, then love really will be all I need.

_ So, there you have it. My life recently has been all about wasting itself. Hopefully, I'll take more time off from Mindsay after this post, and come back with a better set of stories for next time. None of them will involve wasting class time, tuition money, or love. If they do, then you know I'm still working on it, and I've written here too soon. Take care, everyone.